Saturday, May 5, 2012

Catching a Break

I’d be lying if I said that I can’t seem to catch a break. Because clearly I can.  I caught one in my arm 10 weeks ago.  And last Wednesday, after a few weeks of therapy, I was finally given the approval to begin doing everyday activities without my splint. I now only wear it while driving or sleeping.  So this morning when I rolled out of bed at 11am and casually slipped on my flip flops and stepped onto my concrete patio to check on my roses, it would have been nice to know that it had rained during my twelve hour slumber.  Instead, I found out the hard way.  The very hard way.  My feet slid straight out from under me on the slick concrete and I fell flat on my back – catching the weight of my body with only one thing– my splint-free left arm.  Yep. One step forward, ten steps back.  The swelling was almost as instant as the hysterical tears. I cried, a lot.  Partly because of the intense pain, and partly because I did not want to go through all of that again. Surgery. Pain. Helplessness. The more I recounted the last two months, the more I cried, certain that I had re-broken my arm. The pain, the swelling, the shakiness – all overwhelming. And you know what makes me so mad? I never fall. I think the last time I fell was 6 years ago during an ice storm in Oklahoma City. And, of course, on Day 4 without my splint on I totally wiped out.

Before I even managed to get up, I knew I had to go to the ER. I called my friend Ashley, still crying hysterically. Our conversation went something like this:
Me: (crying hysterically) Where are you?
Ashley: Leaving Walmart. What’s wrong? Are you okay? Emily… what’s going on?
Me: Do you have groceries in your trunk?
Ashley: Um, yes???? What’s wrong? Talk to me.
Me: I’ll call you later.

And then I hung up. I thought, “I’m fine. I’ll drive myself. She has groceries.” Obviously I wasn’t thinking very clearly. Duh. I would drop anything for her and I was worried about her orange juice?? She wasn’t settling for that either. She called me back, assuring me that the groceries in her trunk were not nearly as important as me. I explained what had happened and she came to take me to the ER.  On our way to the hospital she explained that when I hung up on her she had created an entire scenario in her head that I had been kidnapped and had to hang up the phone because my kidnapper was coming back into the room and I had to hang up really fast to avoid getting caught. Okay. That must have been a full 30 seconds of mental torture, Ash. I promise to never hang up on you again! But if I am ever kidnapped, I know who to call!

Anyways, I have seen the inside of a hospital a few too many times recently.  They took x-rays of my arm and were surprised when I knew exactly how to place my arm in various positions for the xrays without being prompted.  Not exactly what I want to be a pro at.  

 An ER Pro

After plenty of waiting around, the doctor broke the news.  Everything looked normal! My poor arm had experienced more trauma and is now sprained, but the plate and screws are still where they are supposed to be and there are no new breaks! So I am back in pain, back in a splint, and now intimately familiar with homemade, leaky Ziploc ice packs. But I am sooooo thankful to be sprained and not broken. 

And I’m thankful for Ashley taking care of me! She’s the best kind of friend in emergencies – she’s calm, takes care of business, and from Chicago.  Girlfriend can drive you somewhere in a hurry!

And I feel bad for my poor mother who met me at the ER.  When I called to tell her I had fallen, she cried just as much as I did.  She didn’t want to relive the past two months either!

As a side note - I have been in this ER several times before - once because the counter at Which Wich fell on my foot. Yep, I get weird injuries!

But to make the day a little brighter, my mom and I got to keep my nephews at my condo for a few hours tonight.

If you are looking for a comfortable way to watch tv, try this...

Or this...

Or this...

Or this...

Or this...

Or this...

And then, of course, there is always the classic way to watch tv...

Apparently watching Kipper has become a sport. These little guys have more energy than I do for sure!  At one point this evening my mom finally said, “Boys, Aunt Em has lots of things in her condo that aren’t meant to be touched.” It’s true. I found out tonight that when I have children some day I will have to do a complete overhaul of my furniture and décor. But these little boys made my day.  They always do!

 He drew me a zebra to make me feel better!

And on this fine Cinco de Mayo I am skipping the chips and salsa and getting in bed early - leaky ice pack in tow - surrounded by my top three favorite movies of all time and all seven seasons of my favorite tv show.

My Big Fat Greek Wedding, Hitch, The Blind Side, and Gilmore Girls

And in other news, my roses are just fine. But I won’t be visiting them again any time soon.

Raindrops on Roses = a favorite thing. Raindrops on concrete = not a favorite thing.

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